November 15, 2017

Sue and Al became a powerful team when Al became physically challenged, He had to learn to read, write, walk, talk and spell all over again. They searched the computer, talked with doctors and navigated the health care system to find Brain Gym, Laughter Yoga and other specialized programs to achieve a balanced life and success in healing. Both believe in miracles and working together. Miracles took place daily. Al Resnick has come a very long way in his recovery.

Sue’s background includes being on several boards for prevention of suicide which helped her to work with Al. Having had others family members seriously ill and a son who died by suicide, she is acquainted with navigating the healthcare system. She is the author of Good Night My Son, I Love You. The book is a profound experience in building tools and willingness to learn how to work with a mentally challenged adult son. To learn how to navigate the healthcare system is mandatory in all health challenges.

Her website is http://livingwithsuicide.com She is a public speaker in prevention of suicide and now Sue and Al will be working together to share all the conservative and out-of-the-box programs they have embraced on Al’s journey back to health.

January 8, 2017

Life is a gift for a multitude of people.  It is a puzzle with serious challenges and joyful expression of love.  For some, it is the height of atrocious thoughts that are uncontrollable.  It is an enigma to much of the population and although suicidal thoughts and mental illness is far more publicized, it is also far more widely spread and on the rise.  What do we do about it and how can we take the success stories and learn from those who were or are suicidal but have learned to control their thoughts.  Is it possible and why are we not massively learning from those who have achieved living life successfully?

Please let us know your story so that you can help others to help themselves.  Please share specific tools that have worked for you.  We will funnel them on to support groups.

YOU ARE VERY IMPORTANT AND WHAT YOU DID FOR YOURSELF COULD HELP OTHERS.  WE LOOK FORWARD TO YOUR STORIES, YOUR TOOLS AND YOUR SOLUTIONS.

See our contact page to contact us.

March 20, 2016

 

SIFT – Suicidal Ideation  Family Teams is a Steering Council devoted to prevention of suicide, mental health awareness and navigation of the health care system. We are a group of clergy, professionals and lay people working together to bring tools to those in need that can be utilized now to develop a team of doctors, therapists and whomever else is appropriate in order to achieve a better quality of life.  We are presenting this support group as well as the program shared on March 23rd at Beaumont Hospital Administration Building  Auditorium, Royal Oak, Michigan with AMI- Alliance for the Mentally Ill. ( See notice for March 23, 2016 program.)

We can move from victim to victor.  We can take giant steps to achieve living life successfully.

This support group is devoted to the family and friends of loved ones who have suicidal thoughts.  The purpose of this group is to b ond together in order to support one another with suggestions and mutual understanding.  This empowers the family to maintain their own good health while helping their loved one.

The group will take on a persona of its own as each person shares their concerns and what has worked for them.  Being with people who understand the emotional upheaval for all those who love the sick person is priceless.  All information is CONFIDENTIAL.  This is a lay support group.

 

The first support group will be held at Beaumont Hospital, Royal Oak Michigan on April 6, 2016 on the lower level in classroom 1 at 7:00 PM Eastern Time.

 

For additional information with call AMI-Alliance for the Mentally Ill, 248-706-0591

Sue Serlin, Founder and Chairperson

Dr. H. Huebl, Steering Council

August 19, 2015

Prevention of suicide is a conscious decision for all of us, therapists, parents and all of society. What we do as individuals influence our society as a collective whole.  Achieving healthy youth and adults is a process that is the responsibility of the media, school system, peers and family.  To help youth achieve   their highest potential we as adults need to be a demonstration for, “successful living.”  What we say, our gestures, voice inflection and body stance all build a menu of success. Youth observe just as we adults observe. And we often mimic what we observe. This applies to emotionally distraught minds, mentally ill and healthy children and adults.

When dealing with prevention of suicide there are several factors.  Among them are:

1. Understanding and compassion for those who are suicidal.
2. Recognizing the trauma that takes place for family and the concerns of friends and loved ones .
3. Researching and implementing tools to help us grow and heal.
4. Being aware  of the messages we deliver to youth and how to uplift and/or change messages that do not respect and build healthy minds.
5. Recognizing that all our decisions have consequences that bring forth outcomes.

Mental illness happens, suicide happens however, what we do to prevent the tragedy of a life short-lived makes a humongous difference.

Building healthy youth and adults begins with indirect permission and discussion that creates confident, enthusiastic individuals that are willing to trust themselves.  They walk into the unknown and build  steps to success.

Below is the profound insights and suggestions from teens.  They are marvelous.  And may I add that youth are forming there own organizations and “buddy systems” to help students who appear emotionally distraught.

 LIVING THROUGH THE EYES OF YOUTH

     I attended an Optimists Club special event in Southfield, Michigan.  The subject matter discussed in a speech contest was “How My Optimism Will Help Me to Press On To Greater Achievements In The Future.” What an awesome question to ponder and the answers were in my opinion, mind boggling. I ask you, imagine our world whereby positive thoughts words and deeds are the acceptable norm and our media focuses on what uplifts and gives hope?  What if we concentrated on stories of success and messages that give permission to use our talents to the most high? The Media is extremely powerful in determining what acceptable behavior is and what thoughts we consider, “normal.”  Indirectly, each reporter or broadcaster gives permission to be fulfilled and happy or down and out and even in the middle.  I love when I read a beautiful story of helping others or a magnificent experience of success.  It elevates my thoughts to think, I can do that too!

This does not mean that we are simply wearing a smile and underneath are the darkness of the dawn.  All of us need to deal with our issues. Veils are prevalent in our society and veils create darker veils.  What we do not address grows.  What we focus on becomes a part of us and how we affect others.

Imagine 10 young people, excited and even a little nervous voicing their thoughts as to how optimism has helped them.  They have prepared, researched and integrated their own personal self-worth in their speeches.  The prize is a scholarship and other gifts.  The real prize is their own self-worth and future gifts to society.

“I am filled with greatness.  I have achieved greatness and further greatness is awaiting me.”

That was said by probably a 16 year old young man.   Greatness becomes the norm if said over and over and heard over and over and life is generated from this “new norm.”  All of us have greatness within us.  And, if we think that we begin with greatness that is an awesome place to start.  Greatness is in the eyes of the beholder and means something different to us as individuals.  What if this was shared over and over in school?  First, we may laugh but then we may think about what this means to us.  It’s a responsibility to demonstrate greatness and ultimately it could become the norm. Could positives help to lessen demoralized teenagers?  Could it reinforce healthy minds that soar with greatness?

“A good attitude has great latitude” What does this say to you?  When you smile and challenge yourself to constantly improve, you elevate this good attitude and you brings forth great latitude as you further your success.  Just one sentence can change a person’s life.

“Optimism is my future.”   For those of us with mental illness or emotionally distraught, choice is extremely challenging but choice can help us to create lives of worth.  We are privileged to have the ability to choose and if society further honors and respects positives more so then ever before, imagine how many more excellent choices there would be. And we’d be increasingly aware as the power of choice could be introduced and accepted among our peers.

Take for example Dr. Martin Luther King.  His name was expressed as a spirit of optimism going forth with fist pounding commitment at all costs.  This was a man of positive revelation who changed the world.

“The function of education is to teach one to think intensely and to think critically.  Intelligence plus character—that is the goal of true education.”

Martin Luther King Jr.

What is character to you?  Thinking critically and respecting ourselves, our thoughts and our differences is one of the foundations for inner worth and outer strength.

“Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, “What are you doing for others?”

Martin Luther King Jr.

How are you helping others?  How are we helping ourselves?

What contributions have you made to society?   Each “little” step we take is in reality a giant leap.  One step leads to a greater step and ultimately we are not awaiting greatness, we are there. Overcoming or dealing with illness is a huge giant leap. And greatness is in the eyes of the beholder.

 

“Learn from yesterday, live for today and hope for tomorrow.  The important thing is not to stop questioning.”

Albert Einstein

This is another outstanding over comer and achiever that were mentioned by the youth.  For me, it said, “Keep on keeping on.”  Listen to your intuition.  Seek help.  Every one of us are important to this world.

 

“Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.”

Albert Einstein

Building an attitude of latitude requires discipline, focus and watchfulness.  It does not require, “being perfect.”  It requires the desire to do better and know more.  Complementing yourself for your efforts and for the, “smallest movement forward” is a must.

Michael Jordan was the third person of fame that was mentioned.  All three people have, “failed or learned what not to do” and all three persons achieved due to discipline and never never giving up.

“Talent wins games but teamwork and intelligence wins championships.”

Michael Jordan

All of us will not acquire their fame but all of us can acquire happy fulfilled lives.  It is much harder for some than others, but it is doable.  And you are of value to everyone around you.

 

Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen and others make it happen.

Michael Jordan

I hope the millions of people I’ve touched have the optimism and desire to share their goals and hard work and persevere with a positive attitude.

Michael Jordan

Regardless of your circumstances, regardless of your health, you contribute to life.  All the youth we have lost to suicide or an attitude of, “I can’t” rather then, “Yes I can”, all of us have lost.  You are the future Thomas Edison’s, Dr. Martin Luther King’s and Michael Jordan’s. Whatever you do, appreciate the steps you take and learn from your mis takes.   You are a valuable part of life.

Make it a platform of success.

 

 

 

 

 

 

November 18, 2013

When we are in bereavement, we experience guilt, shame, blame, rage, desperation and intense pain. I experienced it. We bargain with the unknown to stop the suffering but the suffering doesn’t stop. There is no closure with the grief from suicide. We are not insane but there is work to do. There is no healing in accordance with the dictionary definition. There is only numerous whys. And yet, most of us get through it and go on with our lives. Some of us gain new strengths and are amazed at the courage we possess. We deal with forgiveness for ourselves and we learn to appreciate who we are.

There is no right or wrong, good or bad as we cope with grief. We take the time we need and we do the best we can. Not only are we dealing with oursselves but our children need us, our husbands or wives need us and we may feel like we have no place to turn. However, we do have someplace to turn, we can turn toward each other.

This is where reaching out with love is so beautiful. What do you say to someone who has lost a child, a husband, a loved one? All grief has a pattern and all grief responses have their own individual components. I can’t say to you that my grief is worse than yours or that you will heal soon. I don’t know and for me, grief at times was overwhelming. Time, decisions and awareness help us to find ourseles. Grief groups help us to move forward and being with others who have had similar experiences is soothing and enlightening. For some it is the only safe place to be. People share their insights and we learn from their experiences. Some are quiet and they come to the group to listen. Others need to be alone; support groups are not the answer for them. Each of us moves forward in our own way. So, what do you say when someone loses a loved one to suicide? What have others said to you?

Sometimes while visiting a person in grief, it is appropiate to simply listen and be there knowing your presence is what they need. Ask how can I help you rather then tell. Ask if the bereaved would like you to listen or respond to what they are saying. Ask and offer dinner or help in the house. Form a group and prepare dinner for your visit. It is important to know when it is wise to ask and wiser to, “come on over with lunch.”

Even bereaved letters can be helpful or hurtful though they are well meaning. Some letters are lectures; others are religious and may not take into account that the grieving person is not religious. And some are so beautiful you just want to hug them for their marvelous thoughts. I would think that all letters are well meaning. Often we share or send a note without knowing what to say. The empathy note is greatly appreciated. While we realize that some people ignore us because they fear saying the wrong thing, we can be hurt by the silence. This is especially true where a suicide is involved.

I would like to share a special letter. Evaluate what makes this a great letter and how you would feel receiving it. I know how I felt. I felt safe, respected and my son Joel was respected also. I invite you to share the beautiful things that help and your letters that you cherish.

This site is for asking questions and receiving suggestions. And so the following is one of my special letters. What’s yours? What had a touching impact on you? What did someone do for you that you will treasure always?

Dear Sue:

I extend my condolences. I didn’t know Joel well. I was in a professional writing program with him and he excelled in a unique style of expressing himself. He would come into the sessions and light up the room. Always he appeared to be happy. And I do not think of Joel as the lofty soul of loneliness. He attracted people with his warmth. In thinking about a person so distraught that he had to take his own life, I am writing the following:

Imagine Joel was a soldier on the battlefield everyday without the proper equipment. The equipment was lost in the fight. He fought every moment with what he had even though he knew he was missing the battle necessities to win. Was this man not courageous? Just the fact that he kept on moving forward was a tribute to his fortitude. In my mind, Joel was a courageous soul who fought a hard fight.

I can’t begin to think what it is like to lose Joel. He had so much to give.

Thank you for allowing us to be part of your closure and having a service in Iowa.

In appreciation and empathy,